I Guess I Am My Own Religion

I don’t see myself as a religious person; I don’t belive in something I would like to call God, and I don’t agree with many aspects of religion as it is practiced in the world today. I do however believe that there are forces we do not understand, but I cannot decide if I believe those forces are somewhere out there in the universe affecting us from the outside, or if they exist within us, as a seperate and secret part of our conciousness. Maybe the answer, if any, is a bit of both. Also, since I am studying psychology I am of course tempted to lean towards the idea that we are controlled mostly by our own minds.

I am sure it has happened to most of us at some point in life at least, that we find ourself in a situation we cannot really explain, where it feels as if the universe is somehow listening in on our minds and bring things our way. Sometimes, without you even trying, at least not on a concsious level, the exact things that you secretely needed right now just come your way in a way you cannot explain or find any logic reason behind. In the same way, sometimes when you really try to make somthing work, or you struggle to get something, it can seem as if the entire universe has decided to put every obsticle it has in your way to prevent you from reaching you goal.

I like to believe that things come to us when we let go. We spend too much of our time worrying; about the past, about the future, about our actions, about our looks, about what other people think about us, about which choice is the right one, and so on. I believe that all this worrying is doing nothing exept blocking us from all the opportunities and good things that are out there waiting for us, so when they pass by we don’t even notice because we are blinded by our own thoughts and made up scenarios. That’s why, when good things suddenly come our way, as it seems from nowhere because we were not expecting them, we are surprised. Maybe in reality, the simple reason is that we let go and put our worries aside, and suddenly we are open and can see things that was hidden from us before.

The truth is that the universe has been answering you all of your life, but you cannot receive the answers unless you are awake.
― Rhonda Byrne, The Secret

Our mind is such a powerful thing. I more and more realize how much about ourselves we do not understand or know. Sometimes I really feel like there is a whole other side of me somewhere in my brain, who has thoughts and ideas I have no control over, and knowledge I don’t know where it comes from. I am obviosuly not the first person to think like this, and many scientist through the years have had different theories regarding our different levels of consciousness and how they effect us. One popular image used to describe the mind is the iceberg, where the top represents our conscious mind and thoughts and the things we are aware of (a pretty small percentage). Underneath the surface however, there is a huge part of the iceberg that belongs to the unconscious mind. When seeing it like this, it seems obvious that we should find ourselves in situations we cannot explain consciously, since the majority of our mind is working hidden underneath the surface. Maybe, most of the things we find the need to explain and blame on forces from the outside, are in fact the hidden forces from within us.

music_mainpic3Since I always loved to write, I often think to myself that I wish to live my life in a way so that I can write a book about it at some point, and during a period a few years ago I used to mentally write pages of this hypothetical book in my mind as I went a long. I remember that when I moved to Israel five years ago, I was mentally writing this chapter in my book, and there I explained that I lived in Israel for five years. Still, I have no idea why it was supposed to be 5 years, but it just seemed like the right amount of time somehow. Concsiously, I have not given it much thought since, and I have even thought about living here for much longer. However, now five years have passed, and suddenly I start to feel restless. As this feeling of restlessness came to me I remembered the chapter in my hypothetical book. It is almost as if some part of me put an alarm clock for 5 years in to the future, and it just went off, telling me it’s time to move on to the next chapter.

However, I am hitting the snooze button this time. I have two years left of my bachelor degree here in Israel, and for the moment I plan to complete them. So maybe this chapter will be a bit longer than my mind planned for me, which I guess is also part of life; sometimes we have to take it as it comes and trust that everything will work out for the best when we let go and let life in. At other times, it is probably wise to listen to that big piece of iceberg hidden underneath the surface, because it feels pretty safe to assume that there is more place for knowledge to be stored there compared to in the little top that can be seen. So if I need to define myself as belonging to any kind of religion (which I genereally don’t think I need to), I guess I would say the best answer would be that I believe that I am my own religion.

Your life right now is a reflection of your past thoughts. That includes all the great things, and all the things you consider not so great. Since you attract to you what you think about most, it is easy to see what your dominant thoughts have been on every subject of your life, because that is what you have experienced. Until now!
― Rhonda Byrne, The Secret